Shhhhrrrrriiiiiipp

That’s the sound your skin makes as it peels off of your leather sofa in this hot, humid, unbearable heat. Dear god, why can’t it just be mild? 20 degrees, that is my perfect temperature. Not hot, warm. But no, it’s gotta be 30, sometimes 40. That’s just not natural! This is Canada we’re talking about, we don’t have all those silly igloo stereotypes for nothing!

While I can handle (okay, tolerate) being all gross and sweaty, I just feel so bad for my animals. All three cats are long-haired, and Chewy is a frickin’ Malamute. I give them cold water from the fridge and put ice cubes in it, but I can’t really do any more than that and it makes me feel like a jerk. I can hose Chewy off, but could you imagine trying to hose off a cat? Not bloody likely.

The longer this heat goes on (we’re sitting at nearly 4 straight weeks of it), the more I worry about global warming. I haven’t lived on Vancouver Island my whole life, but I have been coming here on a regular basis since I was a baby. Summer, Thanksgiving, Christmas, Spring Break, I’ve done every season of Island weather my entire life, and it has never been like this. Never. This just isn’t our natural climate, we’re a fucking rainforest. A northern rainforest. Where’s the rain?

We’re heading for a tropical climate change it looks like. Maybe the scientists are wrong and it is just a naturally occuring event. I mean, the planet was tropical when the dinosaurs were alive, so perhaps there’ll be another ice age in a few thousand years. Maybe it’s Earth’s cycle. That still doesn’t make me worry any less. I’m not suited for tropical climates. Maybe I should move to the arctic… but oh wait! Our nothernmost territories are some of the hottest places in the country this summer. What the fuck?

The planet is going crazy.

Fuck you, bacteria.

So I’ve spent the last three weeks battling with one fucking sickness or another. First it’s a monster cold that I get from Drew. That goes away, mostly, and I feel great for, oh 3 days. BAM! This sinus infection hits me like a speeding semi-truck from out of left field. Seriously, sinus infection? Where the hell did you even come from?

So finally Sunday, in agony, I call 8-1-1 and talk to a registered nurse. I’m convinced by this point that I have swine flu, but she calms my fears and tells me it sounds like a throat infection. She insists I go see a doctor that day, and I obliged. Thankfully my doctor was in the clinic for walk-in hours that day, and the clinic was all but dead. 10 minutes and I had my prescription in hand.

Drew, being the lovely sweetheart he is, picked me up some NyQuil and gingerale at the store so I could sleep for the first time in weeks. See, I’d been having this issue where I’d sleep for 3 hours, wake up in a coughing fit and be unable to sleep again for 10. As you can imagine, it did absolutely nothing for my health or sanity. I took my new antiobiotics chugged some NyQuil, and slept for 34 hours (waking up every 8 only to pee, take more meds, and drink a glass of water).

I’m starting to feel better, but it still hurts like a son of a bitch. I have vowed to never get this sick again, but knowing my immune system (or lack thereof) I’ll be sick in a few months again. Fuck off, diseases. Seriously, fuck off and die.

Is there life in the universe?

Every time I hear someone ask that question, I just want to slap them. Of course there’s life in the universe. We can’t even begin to wrap our minds around the endless enormity that is the universe. The sheer amount of galaxies and star systems just around us is enough to make your brain hurt, let alone the rest of the universe.

It never ceases to amaze me how human beings from all walks of life (scientists, religious fanatics, professors, etc) endlessly debate this, as if it was ever really a question. Are we so proud, so arrogant that we can truly believe we are the only advanced species in the entire universe? We who threaten to kill our own planet, threaten to make ourselves extinct regularly, and have only begun to scratch the surface of space travel? Can we even be called intelligent life ourselves?

In the untold vastness that is our universe, who knows how many different species of sentient beings there are? Who knows what kind of technology is out there? I fear we may never know. Human nature is an ugly thing, and while we have proven to be resilient, there’s no guarantee we won’t end up blowing ourselves up for good.

We need more money put into different energy research, our space programs need a serious rebooting, and we need to stop these ridiculous notions of “superior races.” We’re all one species in the end, our biological make-up is the same.

That’s just my random thought of the day.